So, the Bishop* called me this morning. He wants me to come to church early and talk to him tomorrow.
I figure it's one of two things. He either read this blog and I'm going to "get a talking to" or I'm getting a new calling.**
More than likely it's a new calling. Can I just say that I have knots in my stomach? I just know it's going to be something like teaching 9 year old boys primary*** or doing Cub Scouts or teaching Sunday School or something equally horrifying to me. I've never been so nervous about possibly getting a new calling before.
I think I may throw up.
*A Bishop is the local congregation leader--like a Pastor or Reverend. ** A calling is simply a job in the church. Teaching a class or leading the music, etc... ***Primary is what the children's religious classes are called.
Happy Saturday, folks! It's time again for my TV week in review.
(Crystal, Lost will be last this week just for you)
Battlestar Gallactica: "I'm coming for you all!!!!" You've gotta love President Roslin. Hell hath no fury like a middle aged single woman who thinks her new boyfriend just got executed. I would like to officially say that I wish I could have been in the firing squad that killed Gaeta (or Stumpy, as I like to call him). My favorite scene of the night was when Lee didn't pull the pin on the grenade. Classic. And can someone please explain the whole Baltar/Six thing? I spent all last season totally confused by it, and then it was back again last night. I don't get it. But Six looks a million times better with longer, darker hair. Oh, and when Baltar first woke up from his dream about Adama's execution, I was seriously worried that the whole season so far had just been his dream. I would have been seriously cheesed if that had been the case. So here's my theory about how the whole show is going to end: Time travel. You read it here first.
Top Chef New York: Not much to say here except I was disappointed (and surprised) that Jamie went home rather than Lea. And I think Carla (my personal favorite) has a better chance than I originally thought. I think she's the dark horse in this race. She impressed Eric Ripert, no easy feat.
Celebrity Rehab Sobriety House: Oh Amber. Why? I had high hopes for you. I'm glad Steven Adler watched the video of himself when he was high. I still don't think he'll stay sober long term, but I do think it was a wake up call he needed. And Andy Dick!! I love him--I'm glad he decided to join the show. And I'm glad he pointed out that it was just plain old Rolling Rock beer that caused him so much trouble--that it doesn't have to be hard drugs or hard liquor or pills. Next week's previews are worrisome. I like Seth and things don't look good good for him.
(O.K. Crystal, stop reading now)
Lost: This week was marginally better than the rest of the season so far. Watching Sawyer watch Kate in the jungle was heart breaking. Poor, poor Sawyer. He needs a hug. I volunteer! And Ben. I don't know. Why do you think he came clean so easily about being the one trying to take Aaron? Telling the truth is so very un-Ben-like. The best part of the episode was, of course, Jin being alive AND seeing a young and pregnant Danielle. (Although the Danielle part was predictable--I knew as soon as they said the wreckage was French). Anyway... Here's a vague theory about the Indian airline wreckage/camp. Something goes wrong and the O6 don't get back to the island. The island still needs people. Jacob still needs people. So, boom! The Indian airline crash. A group of different people doing the same thing as our Losties. We'll see. Also, I think I have the backwards talking Walt thing figured out--When Walt showed up talking backwards it was from a time flash. He was going back in time, and therefore spoke backwards. For example, if Sawyer had decided to speak when he saw Kate in the jungle, I bet Kate would have heard it backwards. I know there are a lot of holes in that theory--I'm still working it out. It makes my brain hurt. Hey, wait...why is my nose bleeding?
Last year I trained for 6 months, raised $4,500 thanks to fabulous friends and family, and walked 60 miles in the Breast Cancer 3-Day in October. I can't top that this year, though I'm in year two of growing my hair to donate it to women through Pantene Beautiful Lengths, and have an appointment next week to have all my lady parts and one annoying mole on my shoulder checked for cancer.But...In reading your post, I realize I have stopped doing the one thing that my dear friend, Yvonne (who is battling stage 4 breast cancer), said meant the most ... Since the walk, I haven't been stopping by to just listen and to pray with her like I had been. Praying out loud is hard for me and so I stopped. So thanks for your post, I'm stopping by today on my way home from work.
Deb, you are so totally telling cancer to suck it!! Congratulations--you will soon be the proud owner of some Mary Kay SPF 30 sunscreen (and maybe even an extra goody or two).
We're only 6 days into Cancer Can Suck It Month (from here on to be known as CCSIM), and it already feels like a roller coaster ride.
First the good news.
In case you missed it in my last post, Harmony, our CCSIM inspiration, came through her surgery with flying colors and the doctors were able to remove all traces of cancer.
Also good news: Tonight I will announce the winner of the Cancer Can Suck It giveaway. You still have about 10 hours to enter.
Now for the bad news. Lorena, also an inspiration for CCSIM, has decided not to undergo treatment for her stomach cancer now that it's back. She only has a very short time to live. So, I guess that's one point for cancer.
Also, your entries for the CCSIM giveaway make me cry. I can't read them anymore. Your attitudes are inspiring but your circumstances are heartbreaking. Thank you for sharing with us and reminding us that even in the most dire of circumstances, cancer can still SUCK IT.
...and swam my laps without incident. Sorry to disappoint.
So anyway, I have a million things flying around in my head. Prepare for some randomness.
1. I now have a crush on Stephen King. Sure, he's a geeky weirdo, but A. He hails from my hometown, and B. He totally called Stephenie Meyer a crappy writer and said the Twilight series sucks unless you're a hormonal 15 year old girl. (O.K., those weren't his exact words, but it's what he meant.) Read about it HERE. I heart you, Stephen.
2. When did Hootie go country? I was listening to the country station on the way home from the Y (Don't judge me. The only alternative was "Let's Stay Together" by Isaac Hayes, and let's face it--once you've heard Chef singing "Salty Chocolate Balls" any other song by him pales in comparison). Anyway, I was listening to country and a song came on and it sounded very much like Hootie and the Blowfish. Except countrified. And then the announcer said it was Darius Rucker (AKA Hootie). Who knew? And it was pretty good.
If you have never heard "Chocolate Salty Balls", it's worth the 4 minutes of your life to listen now.
3. There are two little old Asian ladies that sit around naked and chatting in the locker room every day. Where do you look? I'm not accustomed to locker room nakedness, especially when it involves old ladies lounging, legs gaping, right next to my locker. (I'll give you a moment to let that mental image sink in. Think grey pubic hair.)
O.K., now picture her naked.
4. I now have three magazine subscriptions coming to me that I did not order and did not pay for. I've contacted the companies, and they say they're paid in full for a year, but they cannot tell me who paid for them. I'm getting Better Homes & Gardens, Ladie's Home Journal and Women's Health. If you're the one who ordered them for me, 1. Thank you and 2. Please fess up because it's giving me a paranoia complex.
5. If you misspell hotmail when typing www.hotmail.com you will get porn.
6. I have gained 4 pounds this week. FOUR!! I'm completely freaking out. How can I gain weight? HOW? HOW??!!!!!!!! I swam an extra 30 minutes today in defiance of the poundage.
7. Despite the evil 4 pounds, Amelia paid me the best compliment ever this morning. She said, "Mom, your tummy is getting little like a kid!" She's now my favorite child.
8. I'm saving most of my thoughts for Saturday's post, but I have to at least say this: Jin!!!!!!!
9. If I ruled the world, because would be spelled becasue. It would just make my life simpler.
So, today being Tuesday, I went to do laps in the pool at the Y.
They only had 4 lap lanes open, all being used, but you're supposed to double up. So, I hop in the widest lane and start my laps.
The next thing I know, the man who was also in the lane grabbed my arm and started yelling at me.
He was an older man--60-ish, probably, and Middle Eastern. My guess would be Saudi. Now, please please please don't send me hate mail about this. I am simply stating the facts as they happened.
He tells me that I can't be in this lane. Silly me thinks that he means he doesn't want to share the lane period. So, I point to the sign stating that lanes must be shared. He says no, I as a filthy dirty whore, cannot share the lane with a man.
Excuse me?
Then he starts a whole tirade about the travesty of having to share a whole pool with filthy whores (I swear, those were his words), but to have one in the same lane was beyond what he could tolerate. Because, you know, those floaty dividers are going to keep my filthy whore cooties off of him.
I told him to suck it and continued my laps.
By this point the life guard had come over and was dealing with him. He left shortly after.
He has every right to believe that women are filthy whores if they don a swimsuit and swim in public with (gasp!) men, but don't come to a public pool in the United States of America--a public pool in a building with the word Christian in its name no less--and expect all the women to clear out.
If I see him there again I think I might flash my boobs at him or something.
O.K. So, I didn't see a big difference between the day of surgery and 11 days after, and I see even less difference between 11 days out and 18 days out. But the difference between the day of surgery and 18 days out makes me want to sing from the mountain tops with Gay Chad by my side.
I have lost 29 pounds since the surgery, 59 pounds since September.
