Happy Mother's Day

So, Liam was the only person in the family (including Will) to acknowledge the day with a gift of any kind. (Seriously, I didn't even get a card. But that's O.K. I'm comforted by the knowledge that I have a flat stomach.) Anyway, Liam brought home a cook book that his teacher compiled--filled with each child's favorite recipe that their mom makes. Here's a sampling:

Pancakes by Talasia C.

Cake
Pizza
Tacos
Bread
Egg

Put them together and stir them up. Cook them in a pan for 1 minute. Eat them.

Or, my favorite:

Corn Dogs by Kholten F.

Corn dogs
Ketchup

Buy a box of corn dogs at the store. Put them in the microwave for 59 minutes. When it beeps, take them out. Put them on a paper plate with ketchup. Eat them.

I'm pretty sure Kholten's mom and I have similar philosophies on cooking (and disposable plate usage).

This was Liam's:

Waffles by Liam D.

Eggs
Flour
Bread
Milk

Crack the eggs. Mix the flour and bread together. Pour the milk in with the other stuff. Cook them for 20 minutes and then eat them.

I'd like to point out that I've never, ever made waffles that were not frozen in a box.

At the end of the book there was a survey each kid filled out about their mom. Here's Liam's.

My mom's name is BRANDI
My mom has BROWN hair and BLUE eyes.
She is 20 feet tall and weighs 30 pounds. {I've taught him well.}
My mom likes to eat SWEETS.
My mom is happy when I AM GOOD.
But I know she is really angry when I AM NOT GOOD. {At least he didn't say "when she beats me."}
My mom's favorite TV show is ABOUT FURNITURE. {And this was before I started watching HGTV 12 hours a day.}
My mom is smart. She knows all about KIDS. {Poor, disillusioned child.}
If my mom could have one wish come true, it would be TO HAVE A BABY. {Wait, what??}
I love my mom because SHE IS SUPER SMART. {Again, I've brainwashed taught him well.}

Happy Mother's Day, internets! I hope you got a bigger haul than I did.