So today's Vegas adventure was a stripper class.
Not only can I now give a mean lap dance, but I can work the pole like a champion tether ball player. And with these tips, now you can too:
- Give the cookie, take it away.
- Just pretend you're putting on lotion.
- Don't do the good stuff on the first song.
- Boob check and sexy stretch.
- If you get tired or bored, just bend over, hold the pole and sway. That'll buy you at least five minutes.
- If you freak out, just turn around and shake your ass.
- Insist on payment upfront.
- Layer your panties.
- Don't get too close to the pole or you'll break your cookie.
- Bruised shins are the sign of an amateur.