Go ahead. Make my day.

So, today has been awesome so far.

First, I pissed off The Angry Chicken at the Y. There was only one treadmill open. She was headed for it, I was headed for it. She was closer, but I was faster and I beat her to it. She flung her towel on the floor and started saying "Dammit. Dammit. Dammit." while stomping her foot like a 4 year old. I think she maybe has OCD or something, because she's very rigid in her routines and if anything throws it off in the slightest she freaks out. A lot. I feel kind of bad for her, but I also find it extremely entertaining. I know. There's a special place in hell for me.

Then I went to Commando Cardio (also known as Torture with Tex. Or Tex Kwon Do if you loved Napoleon Dynamite as much as I did). Anyway, Tex was having us walk across the room in the squat position. He said, "If you do this right and you do it often, you can get muscle definition in your legs like her." And when he said her, he pointed to me. I'm telling you--I have quads of steel and Tex just confirmed it for me.

Then I was in the locker room washing my hands before I left, and an older lady came up to the sink next to me. She looked at me in the mirror and said, "I wish I was young and skinny like you."

Young! And skinny! I don't even care that it's not true--it's still nice to hear.

And? My size 4 jeans still fit after being washed and dried. All the women out there know that's the true test.

So, bring it, internets. Even the insane onslaught of hatemail brought on by Wednesday's post can't get me down today.